The Respondee: I�ve had a change of heart these days. I work in a hospital and just witnessed the slow, horrible death of a 31 year old man who died of AIDS.
I also have a good friend who�s just tested positive in the past few weeks.
I don't want to be weak, have headaches, nausea, etc. I don't want to develop all of those weird diseases and infections that are so debilitating to immuno-compromised people.
I�ve experienced bareback sex and have taken cum inside me. It�s the most satisfying sex kind of sex you can have.
But I talked to a social worker/counselor recently. He told me, and I believe, that my problem stems from feelings of worthlessness. The appeal of seroconversion is a passive form of suicide.
I care so deeply for my pozzed friend. I love him. My biggest fantasy is to have him infect me so I can take over his virus. That is something that would bond us, that we could share, and that I would always have in me�long after he leaves me.
But I can't let that happen. I love bareback sex, I love cum, etc. But I just can't knowingly infect myself.
I have 4 wonderful nieces and nephews I want to see grow up. I have friends and family who need me. My parents are growing older, and they�re going to need me as they age into their senior years.
I could go on, but I won�t, because there are two sides to this story--the FANTASY of getting pozzed and the REALITY.
I�ve decided to live my life, to meet each obstacle and overcome it. I want to live on. You have only one life, and it�s too short, already. Live long, guys.
Responder 1: The decision to get HIV and AIDS is not a choice for everyone. But I still want to get pozzed and intend on doing it, and knowing when it happens. What you described was GRIM�YET MY DICK WAS HARD THE WHOLE TIME I WAS READING IT.
Responder 2: I want to convert. I don't feel worthless or want to commit suicide. I want to be poz, and poz others. We have all thought long and hard about the consequences of HIV and AIDS. Otherwise, we wouldn�t be reading this.
Responder 3: I think the guy who wants to give it all up will sooner or later have to confront his addiction. He may not actively pursue the bug, but sooner or later he'll return to barebacking. His ass has cum to crave cum, and it�s an addiction whether he knows it or not.