B*tched
by Cicero
This is somewhat different from my regular tales more of a stream of consciousness, but I hope it will give you the same enjoyment as my other stories have. Is this fiction or fact? I will let you yourself decide.
[email protected]. All rights reserved of course.
Inspired by mstr.tiger at http://www.tigerdom.com
I sit before my screen waiting for his permission to sign off. I hesitated to ask for it fearing that he might think I was tired of being in my chat with him. That was impossible in my view for I could NEVER tire of him now. When he is online with me I am fulfilled. It’s funny how in just a few short hours he now completely occupies my brain. When he grants me the privilege of conversing with him online I am contented. Seeing the phrase in the instant messenger box signaling he “is typing” something to me sends arousals to my groin and triggers a fevered excitement in my brain. I wait for those typed words to appear on my screen knowing the effect seeing them will have on my yearning to serve him.
He was the owner and creator of a web site that I came across that focused mainly on the concepts of dominance and submission. Unlike the babblings that were normally the rule on other pseudo academic sites in this genre his stated views were maturely expressed and cogently explained. I found it fascinating to find in such a younger man ideas that were strikingly coherent and intellectually compelling. I sought him out on instant messenger telling myself that my search for him was motivated by a simple desire to explore this area in more detail with him. Yet now I know I must have instinctively felt his powerful intelligence and was drawn toward him for another subconscious purpose. When we finally connected online I felt inwardly excited for reasons I had yet to fully comprehend. We chatted about his site and I expressed my appreciation of his views. We conversed about my writings on this subject and soon I became engaged in discussing my own heretofore-private thoughts on the physiology behind dominance and submission. He did not say much during this initial IM conversation, which only increased my interest in him when he did address me on the topic.
After awhile I found myself simply babbling setting forth previously unarticulated internal concepts of my own on this area. All the while he patiently listened. It was as if, through his measured silences, he was drawing me closer toward him while somehow also encouraging me to delve deeper inside my psyche to reveal to my conscious self what was my true nature. At one point, somewhat disorientated by all that I found myself saying to him and, more importantly, what I was discovering about myself in these ramblings, I asked him about how I must appear to him. At that second his viewpoint of me became important in how I saw myself.
He replied calmly that I already knew how I appeared and further, that by now I recognized what I truly was seeking when I first contacted him. I needed only to express it. As I read this I hesitated for a brief flicker of time as all these ideas I had recently set out with him swirled in my brain. Then it all fit together like a jigsaw puzzle. I felt some internal firewall breaking apart. Suddenly it was totally clear. He was what I sought and always craved for in my existence. As I typed my reply it was then that I willingly acknowledged my need to surrender to his comforting powerful dominance.
After this realization, the dynamics of the relationship in our chat encounter changed. Instinctively I no longer felt I was his equal and indeed I now knew that I never was. The sudden awareness of this fact created a surprisingly pleasurable sensation throughout my mind causing my body to respond in kind with the slight hint of sexual arousal. I couldn’t describe it except to say that the knowledge that I properly held only a lesser place in his presence seductively wove around my mind like a warm sensual blanket.
As we continued our IM conversation he permitted me to tell him all about myself. Until now I had always been reticent to ‘give up’ any intimate background facts about myself to cyber acquaintances yet, I discovered that giving him detailed personal information about myself only increased my desires to open up further to him. Soon he was easily mining me about my confidential circumstances. Thoughts that this data gave him more power over me only made the event more arousing. It was as if he was plowing into my mind seeding every facet of my brain with his superiority. Eagerly I handed him keys to use to take me into his firm grip. As it progressed I moaned internally succumbing to the liberating arousing happiness of knowing that in a deeply fundamental mental way this superior man was taking my final cherry. I loved every second of the process of this mind blowing deflowering. If, on some level, offering one’s arse to another man was to surrender a part of one’s manhood how much more was offering one’s brain to another man for humping.
By now, I felt different from the person I had been at the start of our encounter. I found myself reveling in this eager desire to be completely under his control. When I told him this he took this confession in with the same detached calm assuredness that first drew me to him. To him my admission was a normal response, one that he completely expected. Our further discussions on this subject never quickened in their tempo. We continued conversing at the same leisurely flowing pace. When at one point he casually typed that I might possibly become his ‘bitch’ an electric bolt of total capitulation engulfed me. I wanted this designation! I knew any name he now chose to label me just brought me closer to being his property. Like a shy child I told him of this newly borne burning desire that he had created when he had typed that statement. It was then he informed me that considering everything said by me so far I should probably address him as Sir in any of our further communications. Typing “Sir” at once I immediately thought about how deferential I had willingly become to him. No other man had ever raised such submissive desires in me. With him I was no longer a “take-charge” type of man. He had transformed me into a man who “craved being taking charge of ” by another. This concept amazed me yet drew me inward ever more to him. Addressing him as “Sir” thrilled me to my very essence as a man. I still had far to go but the initial steps of my capitulation had joyfully begun!
At the end of our chat he suggested that, since I was a writer, I might wish to write about everything that had occurred as a form of therapeutic release. Before he went offline I begged him to one day rename me to symbolize my rebirth into this now comforting way of thinking. My old incorrect self-image had dissolved and a new one, a truer one, as his property replaced it. He had given me his best gift: an understanding of a proper function around which I could center my life. A role in life that he knew reflected the true inner me. With his guidance I could start to realize what it was always my innate natural character to be. I might, if I proved worthy of him, one day simply be known as: His BITCH!
Not The End But The Beginning…