B*tched: My Journey Continues
by Cicero
The meandering stream flows onward. Is this fiction or fact? I will let you yourself decide. All rights reserved of course. Your comments on it to me are encouraged. Is this fiction or fact? Should it continue? I will let you yourself decide.
Inspired by mstr.tiger at http://www.tigerdom.com
Each time I type “Sir” in our conversations online it only serves to increase my self-awareness of my lesser place with him and, I hope, further solidifies my correctly servile relationship in our encounters. As we talk about subjects and how I am transforming I feel so close to him. His intelligence and quiet demeanor continually thrill me. I sense how lucky I had been to meet him. Even more, I experience this profound gratitude to him for stripping me of my prior false self-image as a “man” who called the shots in his life. His patient generosity in subtly revealing to me this false affection I had previously projected can never be repaid!
How can I truly explain what joy it brings me when, if I’ve done something worthy in his eyes, I see him type the word "bitch” when addressing me instead of his usual term of “boi”. I savor it. Some might find such a label offensive but when he uses it I swell with pride for I understand it is his way of telling me I had brought him pleasure from something I had done. Knowing that only increases my desire to please him more. I am always his “boi” but how much more desirable it is to be thought of as his “bitch”.
Tonight we briefly discussed the subject of cash tributes from slaves (a term about myself I contentedly admit too). From my prior research as a writer in this area I had always felt that one who engaged in this activity of “cash fagging”, was somehow degrading himself and was less than masculine. He was somewhat surprised I had never engaged in this ‘gifting’ myself since I had written about it at various times. We chatted about my views and he casually mentioned the pleasure he might derive from “taking my financial virginity”. It was that simply put. Unlike other so-called “masters” I’d seen in chat rooms who barked and howled like ravenous dogs as they engaged in brow beating and snarling over some poor boy’s financial bones his comment was so quiet and simple. He would derive pleasure in “taking my financial virginity”. As I read the words he had typed I quickly went to a certain pay site and, with the same calmness with which he initially typed that statement; I surrendered another “cherry” to him. I felt a tingling of mental arousal as I hit “send” while I joyfully shed this final aspect of my false sense of my manhood.
Yet, becoming what some would label another “cash fag” was no longer a concern to me. In fact I discovered this concept now physically aroused me! From that moment on my only thoughts were focused how much more I could be completely his “boi”. When later the email came from the pay site telling me had “accepted” my gift I experienced uncontrollable bliss. I printed it out to read over and over and yes, I admit at one point I masturbated while reading it lost in the ecstasy of his kindness in permitting me this; to furnish him with this small token of my submission.
I am his property. I only wish for him to take me in any way he desires. Succumbing to him will always profoundly satiate me both mentally and sexually. His powerful influence has shown me that I had never really been a man but, if I strove hard enough, I might permitted to continue to submissively serve him as his BITCH!
The End Of The Beginning…