Milehigh Man - Workout Journal 9/01/-1: SelfScreen.Com
by F_R_Eaky
“Ah.. hahahaha… sorry…we’re all full of giggles tonight…”
“Yeah! WOOOOOOOO!”
“Shhhh keep it down, dude. We’re in the dorms..”
“Sorry. President…”
“Look, I’m not the president. I’m too young. And stop before we talk about everything before I explained it…”
“Yo! HELLOOOOOOOOOOOO SCREEEEENNNERS!”
“SHUSH! Bad,….mascot…observer…whatever you are, Greg. Shush.”
“AOOOOOW!”
“Austin!... …. …. Ok haahaha… are we settled down enough? Ok…. Hey, fans. I call you fans cause no one has written in the comments below… THE COMMENT SECTION BELOW FOLKS…. Any suggestions for what I should call all of you following me and my progress.”
“AARON’S ACOLYTES!”
“SHUT…UP! AUSTIN! They’re not my holy followers or anything; I’m not starting a cult! At anyrate, please…..PLEASE pleasepleasepleaseplease make suggestion on what to call you all as a group so I don’t make address you all in a boring manner like I don’t care. I really appreciate your comments and suggestions. Anyhoo…. So we’re feeling pretty good tonight.”
“AAAAOUUUUU!”
“AUSTIN! And as you can see I’ve got a bit of a gang in my dorm room. Over there the big man himself, Austin our seven foot wonder on the b-ball court!”
“YO!”
“And next to him at half a foot shorter is my trainer and an awesome college TA, Beau!”
“Hi, Screeners.”
“And this man here….[pulls him in front of him and the camera] this… this is Greg.”
“PARTY ROCK! PARTY Rock Party Rock party rock rock rock rock ro ro r…”
“Bro, you’re not LMFAO hahaahahaaha. So… you’re probably wondering why we’re all dressed up in togas. This was preview night for a lot of the fraternities and sororities on campus. Before you all post and ask, no, I didn’t pledge. In fact none of us did. Well, Beau couldn’t anyway he’s already a member to some fraternity. However, we did better than look and pledge.
You see…I didn’t like a lot of them, they seemed too hyped, too party type… not my style. Austin, well the coach here isn’t too keen on the Greek fraternities…”
“Neither is my mom or my dad. HI FOLKS!”
“SHUSH! Hahahaha well and Austin saw something he didn’t like either today.”
“Yeah, one of my teammates. He’s about as tall as Beau here, and well, he got asked the question guys like us, tall, get asked all the time: ‘Could you help me reach something of this shelf please…’ Now, this teammate of mine made us tall men, and the basketball team look like jerks. He went completely off on this guy. Now, I will admit, I get tired of being asked myself, but the guy couldn’t reach the top shelf, there wasn’t a stepping stool or a ladder or a picker to be seen. So the lil’ man asked the closest tall dude he saw. He even explained he couldn’t find any thing or any staff to help him, so he asked this guy and did so politely and with a ‘please.’”
“Right…so that inspired Austin, after looking around at these fraternities, and after hearing Greg here in shock say when we walked into him by accident in the student union…”
“Good lord you’re tall!”
“Thank you, Greg… and so he thought, ‘You know, yeah it is tiresome to be asked, but we as tall men should appreciate our height, and if needed step up to assist those in need to get books off of shelves…”
“To get cats out of trees!...”
“Er… uhm to stand in the way of bullies…”
“To grab things off the grocer’s shelves….”
“Yeah, all that. To be proud of who we are and to use our abilities to help folks out. So we decided to form our own fraternity. Beau helped us out. We’ve come up with a motto…but that’s secret you’ll have to become a member to learn it. And we’ve chosen a name we’re going to be Gamma Epsilon Pi. And we’re performing our first ceremony tonight. We’ve found ‘Average Joe’ represented by Greg and we’re gonna show him why we’ve come together.”
“Because we’re tall!”
“Yep…and Greg here…well…he’s not.”
“I’m not bad… I’m 5’9”
“True but…Beau there is 6’ 6”…. Say hello Beau…”
“WHOA! I’d gotten kind of used to you around but not so close…geese you’re tall.”
“Greg comes up to Beau’s… well like just above his shoulder. And then there’s me… Hiya, Greg.”
“damn….”
“And the top of Greg’s head come right to my shoulder… And next is your new buddy, Austin.”
“YO!”
“shit...”
“And Greg comes up to Austin’s armpit. And with big dudes comes…”
“Big hands…”
“That’s right, Beau. Greg, put your hand up on Beau’s, and put your foot next to his…”
“damn I feel small…”
“And then comes me…”
“Oh no you don’t… you’re not next hand and foot wise.”
“C’mon, Austin…”
“I’ve seen your dawgs. I only wear a size 18 and you’re what…five sizes larger than me? I’m next..”
“oh lord… your hand could like crush mine…”
“Ok alright… yeah I’ve got big flippers for feet….”
“and hands too…. Jeeze….it was bad enough with Beau and Austin…damn Aaron… can you curl your fingers over mine?”
“What? Uhm…. …. …. … well I’ll be I can. I didn’t know you were that small.”
“I’m not… you’re that big…”
“Let me tilt this cam down, Aaron.”
“What? Why?...”
“Greg, foot out there…. Then you, Beau, …..now me… and now Aaron… Geeze! Look at the size difference! Even between mine and Aaron’s! What size you wear, Greg?”
“I wear a size nmmmmmmmrrrphhmm”
“What? Speak up!”
“I wear a size ten.”
“Ok… and there’s nothing wrong with that! We’re just having a lil’ fun.”
“And that’s what our group is going to do. We may be bigger, taller, but it doesn’t necessarily mean we’re better. So yeah, we’re having a little fun cause it’s really wild seeing ho-OW…(aheeeeem) ha---how much bigger we are than you, but we know we’re not better. You just as cool as us even though you’re half a foot or a foot or more shorter than us. AND.. .aaaand, for those of us who decide they can bully because they’re so much bigger and taller, we’re going to be there for you. Greg is our Fraternity’s adopted brother, and should he ever need us, we’ll step in between him and ha-AR-mmmm…. (cough… haaaaachhhh ahem) harm.”
“Yo, Aaron, you got a cold there or something. Your voice was cracking like that earlier today.”
“I’m fine, Austin, thanks… but I might be coming down with a cold. Throat feels funny.”
“hahahahaha no, you’re coming up with something.”
“What are you laughing at, Beau?”
“Nothing! Nothing… don’t mind me…”
“So at anyrate… brought you this lil’ piece of college life. I’m still working out btw. Beau has been putting me through paces, I’ve not forgot about that.”
“And we’re still miffed he’s not allowing you to join the basketball team.”
“Yeah, but you know why I can’t Austin…and you won’t tell me….But at any rate… I’m working out and I’m getting some definition… I can feel myself getting stronger, but I’m also still gaining some weight round my midsection and that’s driving me nuts…”
“Don’t worry, Aaron. You’ll find out what’s going on in a few weeks.”
“Yeah yeah yeah, Beau. So any rate.. here’s my arm…omphhhhhh still twiggy but kind of defined….I’ve got moobs under the toga and pooch…”
“Pouch!”
“Shut up you two! LOL Okay… any rate…so not so much on my progress, but a lil on college life…and …let me get this back on the stand…and twisted around here… and….let me stand between you too… and there we have the four of us showing off how tall three of us are…”
“Or that we’re all related to…”
“Hey don’t turn the cam back down..”
“to…BIGFOOT! Or at least one of us is…”
“Hey!”
“Everyone wiggle their toes…”
“Ok! That’s it…I’m so gonna…”
crrrrrrrccccccchhhhhhh