Touched 13
by Redkage
“I leave town for two weeks and all of a sudden you’re hanging around Logan?” Jamal’s eyes were practically bulging out of their sockets. Jamal had gone with his parents out of state when his aunt collapsed in Utah, and had just arrived back that day only to find out Simon and Logan were the best of friends. Jamal had finally gotten a chance to confront Simon about it after football practice in the locker room.
“So? What about it?” Simon gave a slight shrug as he pulled on his shirt. Like all of his other clothes it was tighter on him then it was just yesterday. He made a mental note to go clothes shopping after school, since most of the clothes in his wardrobe were either too small or will be in a matter of days.
“So?” Jamal echoed. “Why in the world would you want to be friends with him? He’s ugly, his stupid and he’s got an attitude problem.”
Simon whirled on Jamal, his eyes flashing dangerously. However he managed to grit his teeth together and stop himself from taking a shot at his friend. “Just because he’s not the best looking guy or the smartest doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.” Simon stated. “And he’s mellowed out a lot. He’s actually a nice guy if you try to get to know him.”
Jamal just shook his head. “No one can change that fast, man. And aren’t you at least concerned about what people are saying about this?”
“Let them talk.” Simon said puffed out his chest defiantly. “If they can’t accept it, then fuck them. But anyways maybe the three of us can hang out together. You’ll see for yourself that he’s a great guy.”
“I…think I’ll pass.” Jamal shifted uneasily. “But seriously, I think you should stay away from the Wardens. If anything, Riley would probably try to bite your head off.”
“He won’t be able to. If anything, he’ll break all of his teeth.” Simon grinned at the thought.
* * *
Simon critically inspected the selection of clothing he had just bought, trying to decide what he should wear the next morning. After he had spent most of the afternoon with his friend, he headed for the mall to do a little wardrobe shopping. He went to many of his favorite stores, but all of the shirts and jeans he bought had something in common with each other. So now looking over the fruits of his labor, he was trying to pick out which outfit to put on the next day. In truth, he looked good wearing just about anything, but tomorrow he really wanted to look his best for Logan.
At the thought of Logan, Simon paused briefly in his selection and opened his mind, connecting it with Logan’s. Though he had learned how to stop those random intrusions, there were times when he could not help but find out what that skinny little boy was doing right at that moment. Though he had to admit he mostly just wanted to find out if Logan was thinking about him. Immediately he saw Logan’s hands holding up several playing cards and sitting cross legged in front of him was Eve.
“Do you have any Eights?” Eve asked. Again Simon was surprised by how adorable this child was.
“Aw, how did you know?” Simon heard Logan’s voice as he surrendered his card. She has a King and a two. Logan thought as he looked at his own card. Simon could immediately see that Logan had both.
“Do you have any fours?” Logan asked her.
“Go fish!” Eve giggled as Logan gave a fake groan and drew from the pile.
Gently Simon withdrew his mind from Logan’s. He had an odd feeling in his gut as well as in his chest when he saw that scene. It had been a scene of a brother spending time playing with his little sister.
Quite suddenly Simon was abashed for intruding so suddenly. Quickly he focused his mind back onto sorting through his new clothes.
The next morning Simon got up early. After he took a nice quick shower, he stepped out and glanced at the mirror. The person reflected back was a muscle god. At 6’4¾” high, his muscles were so big he could only be described as muscle bound. 265 lbs. That was his weight now. And thanks to that metabolism he had received from Logan, ever single ounce of it was pure muscle. There was no doubt now that he could win any bodybuilding contest he chose to enter in. Who knows? Perhaps in a few months he’ll grow so big he’d outsize those Mr. Olympia contenders. His arms were thick and hard like steel cylinders, his bulging 21” biceps s strong enough to curl over two hundred pounds in each hand. His 58” chest almost looked impossibly fake, so big and full that it seemed like someone had taken two melons and super glued it onto his torso and covered it with skin, crowning it with two succulent nipples that pointed downwards.
As his eyes followed downwards, Simon rubbed his big hand against his hard 8-pack abs, feeling the deep crevices between each one. Many guys would kill for abs like his, while everyone else just wanted to run their tongue along it. The heads in his quads were each very thick and pronounced, making it a challenge to fit into his jeans and still be able to show off his perfect bubble butt. His calves appeared to be like two oversized water balloons and his legs ended with two size 14 ½ feet. However his most noticeable muscle was the one hanging between his legs. His cock was starting to push 11 inches flaccid, its thickness beginning to surpass a beer can and nestled in a fur of blond hair behind it was his lemon sized testicles. If a normal person had trouble with it before, there was no way Logan could be able to handle all of it now.
Suddenly Simon felt his 11 inch dick become hard. Quickly he pushed all sexual thoughts surrounding Logan from his mind, but still he felt his cock become more and more erect. Blood rushed into his prick, causing his hips to buck. Grinding his teeth, Simon pressed his hands against the wall and hung his head. He was so hard that it actually hurt. His dick ached for release, but he refused to put his hand on it and jack off.
After a few painful minutes his erection died down, leaving Simon panting and covered with a light coat of sweat on his recently showered body. With his libido finally under control, Simon took a towel and began to wipe the sweat off of his body. No matter how painful it was, Simon wasn’t going to allow his hormones to take over. He wanted to prove to Logan that he loved him, and not just love to fuck him like a sex toy. And if he couldn’t handle it by himself in a bathroom, how will he do if it happened when he was with Logan?
With an almost grim expression, Simon walked out of his bathroom. His face noticeably lit up when he saw the outfit he had laid on his bed, however. By the time he had breakfast and walked to the front of Logan’s house, he was smiling again and was excitedly waiting.
Finally, Logan walked out of his front door. “Good morning Si….mon.”
Simon spread his arms wide. “Well? What do you think of it?”
What Simon was referring to was clothes. He was wearing a crisp white long sleeved button down dress shirt and a pair of new white jeans. Usually he wore something tight fitting in order to show off his body, but he purposely picked out clothes that would be loose for his current frame to grow into. Still, it did little to hide the fact that he was a big fella underneath all that fabric. He even bought a pair of pure white sneakers. To finish his look, he even wore a pair of white gloves. His crowning item, however, was a particular red symbol that was pinned over his heart.
“Simon, just what exactly are you wearing?” Logan asked as he walked up to him.
Simon looked away bashfully. “Well…Seeing how you always wear that whole black outfit, I wanted to wear something like it. So, I bought some new clothes and I thought that since you were wearing black, I’d wear white. Kinda like…like matching outfits.”
Logan didn’t reply to Simon. Instead, he reached up and touched the red symbol on Simon’s chest, which perfectly matched the one on his own breast.
“If it bothers you to look at it, I’ll take it off.” Simon said awkwardly. “I’m sure this mark doesn’t symbolize anything good, but I thought that since you wore it, that I should wear it too. Why should you be the only one that has to bear this mark?”
To his surprise, Logan laughed. “Oh no, it’s fine! I’m really…really flattered. And besides, that symbol actually represents the two of us.”
“Really?” Simon’s eyebrows rose. “It does?”
Logan nodded. “Yea, it does. And it also makes me feel a lot better about myself to know that you’re wearing it, even though no one else will think it’s such a good thing. Weird, isn’t it?” He flashed a smile.
Nothing you say or do can be weird Simon thought, then laughed out loud a second later from how corny that would have sounded. The two began to walk to school, and then Simon brought the mark back up again in their conversation. “So, this symbol…it represents the two of us?”
“It does.” Logan said. He reached up and then traced the U with his finger. “The circle represents the Kin-Lam.”
“Wait, how is that a circle when it’s open like that?” Simon asked.
“I’ll get to it in a minute.” Logan said patiently. “This point in the center of the circle represents me. This line,” Logan traced downwards from the center of the circle to the bottom of the symbol, “represents the Fel Neros, the Eternal Bond.”
“Your curse.” Simon nodded a bit gloomily.
“Oh don’t start that up again.” Logan quickly waved it off. “Depressions are so…depressing.”
Simon couldn’t help but chortle at that remark.
Logan rolled his eyes. “Anyhow, this line represents the bond between me,” Logan pointed first at the dot, then at the bottom line. “And you. The broken opening of the circle around this bond stands for how everything the Kin-Lam will flow from me and into you.” Once again Logan ran his finger down the line, starting from the dot and to the bottom line. “Notice how the edges are curved upwards like a cup or a bowl? And this one right here that crosses with the Fel Neros bond represents other people.” Logan indicated the line between Simon’s line and the opening inn the circle. “It stands for how I will be able to pull everyone I touch into it and give it all to you.”
When Logan finished the explanation, the two of them continued to walk forward. Finally, Simon lifted his head. “Why do you have to break the bonds with other people? Why don’t you leave two or three intact? It’ll give you more time, right? And there are some people who deserve to be drained off.”
Abruptly Logan stopped and looked at Simon with a stone cold gaze that made the big guy back away slightly. “That suggestion is beneath you, Simon.” Logan said coldly.
A sudden fear of losing Logan again formed up inside of Simon. “I…I was just-”
“You were just suggesting that I purposely leave some bonds active.” Logan finished for him, no sign of sympathy in his voice. “Well then, I want you to listen closely Simon. I will not, under any circumstances, allow another person to go through what I have, no matter what they may have done. Draining someone means slowly taking their life force away from them. That means what I’ll be doing is a slow murder. Do you wish for me to turn into a murderer?”
Simon jerked his head in some semblance of a no.
“Listen, I want you to stop thinking that way.” Logan stared him down. “I don’t want to hear this kind of stuff coming from you again.”
So ashamed of himself, Simon was unable to look Logan in the face. “I…I’m sorry. It’s just that I…I don’t want to lose you.”
The coldness melted from his expression, Logan stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Simon’s waist. “I know. You’d always try to do anything to help your friends when they need you. Its how you are and I wouldn’t change that for the world.”
Simon breathed in deeply, feeling his nerves unwind again. Logan always knew what to say to make him feel better. However, before Simon could completely become relaxed, he felt his heart began to beat faster and his body become hot as he feels Logan hug him. For a moment he thought he was aroused, but for some strange reason his cock stayed completely soft. Even so, Simon could felt a rather…happy feeling arise in him.
All too soon Logan let him go, and the feeling disappeared when he did. Simon looked at Logan for some sort of answer to what had happened, but Logan simply started walking to school and acted as if nothing had happened. Still, Simon continued to look over at Logan from time to time.
When they reached school, Simon was suddenly aware of all the looks and whispers that were being done as he and Logan passed through the hallways together. True, he had half expected something like this to happen, but it still didn’t stop him from becoming somewhat uncomfortable. Still, he’d grit his teeth and bear it as he reminded himself that Logan had endured far worse than hearing people talk behind your back.
“Hey Logan, you wanna hang out at your place after school?” Simon asked, trying to put up a normal front. It took him three seconds to realize what he had just asked before his eyes widened and his cheeks turned red.
“Sure, why not?” Logan laughed. “It’s only been what, seven years since you last came over?”
“A-alright then,” Simon replied when they reached Logan’s classroom. “I’ll see you later then.”
The rest of the day Simon had a sort of surprised, wild look on his face. He was a melting pot of emotions as he kept on thinking about going over to Logan’s. He was nervous, excited, giddy and anxious all rolled into one. That feeling even carried all the way through football practice, where the coach did he best to prevent himself from yelling Simon to wipe off that goofy grin off his face since Simon was performing surprisingly great. Simon had finished practice, grabbed a quick shower and had just put on his clothes when Jamal came up to him.
“Hey Simon, how’s it…” Jamal’s voice trailed off when he saw Simon’s outfit
“What do you think?” Simon turned around so Jamal could see him fully. “Does it look good on me?”
Jamal’s eyes, however, were focused on the red mark on Simon’s breast. “Wh-why are you wearing that thing?” He pointed at it. His hand was actually shaking.
“What, this?” Simon touched the emblem. “I thought it’d be cool to wear. Don’t you think it looks cool?”
The look on Jamal’s face was far from agreeing. “You…you shouldn’t wear that.” He stuttered. “I mean, that’s not…it’s…”
“It’s what?” Simon frowned. A sudden thought occurred to Simon.
“It’s not good!” Jamal said, his eyes looking wild. “Do you know what that thing means? That symbol is cursed!”
“Jamal…are you…” Simon threw a furtive glance behind his back to make sure no one was listening. “…are you a Kin-Lam?”
The stunned look on Jamal’s face confirmed it. “Listen man, I don’t know what stories or lies they’ve been feeding you, but you should stay away from Logan.”
“The hell I will!” Simon replied hotly. “So this is why you’ve been telling me to stay away from him. You know all along he was cursed like this, didn’t you? And what do you think of me then? I’m his partner!”
“You’re different.” Jamal said rather weakly. “I got to know you long before I found out you were the one the Falhan Kyn was bonded to.”
“And what about Logan? Why don’t you make friends with him too? He’s a great person if you take the time to talk with him for a few minutes.”
Jamal shook his head violently and looked as if Simon had just told him to become pals with the devil. “No man, I don’t even want to get near him. Would you willingly place yourself in the same room with a guy who can kill off your entire race with a single tap?”
Simon could feel his temper deteriorating rapidly at this point. “He’s not like that at all. He’s been slashing his arms to ribbons to prevent that from happening. He’s accepted all of it. I mean, God, he’s going to die for Christ’s sake.”
“It’s just the way things are.” Jamal muttered. “The sooner he’s gone the better.”
In a flash Jamal was pinned to the lockers with his feet dangling above the floor. “Don’t you dare speak like that of Logan. Ever.” Simon’s face was so close to Jamal’s that the poor guy could feel Simon’s breath on his face. “He’s a way better person than you’ll ever be.”
Jamal’s eyes were wide and fearful. “Simon, I-”
“Shut up and listen!” Simon cut him off, and Jamal’s mouth snapped shut. “Logan’s cursed, I know that. I know that he’s some sort of threat to you people, but he’ll never sink that low and do something like that to anyone, not without cutting off his own hand first. He’s even cutting himself over those fucking bullies that make his life miserable. He has every right to be mad at the world, but he’s so forgiving and caring that he actually acted like a bastard so no one else could get close to him and get hurt. Do you know how lonely he’s been?”
Jamal shook his head. It was all he could do in his situation. He was painfully aware of the large, bulging biceps attached to the arms holding him up. He was also aware of the 267 lbs. quarterback that was in control of those arms.
“And did you know he’s like that because of me?” Simon asked in a low voice, so low it was almost a whisper. “Did you know he touched me on his birthday so that he could stop me from falling off the roof? If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t even be here right now talking to you. He’d given everything up, just to save me. Does that sound like someone who deserves to die? Does that sound like a monster?”
Jamal shook his head again, but this time there was a different kind of feeling in his eyes. Slowly, Simon lowered him back onto the floor and let go of his shirt. Feeling thoroughly disgusted, Simon grabbed his backpack, slammed his locker shut and marched off.
* * *
“Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?” Logan asked again while they walked to his home.
“Not really, no.” Simon muttered a bit more bitterly than he meant to. The rest of the school day had been pretty crappy for Simon. What happened with Jamal had thrown him into a foul mood. The Kin-Lam were worse than the bullies at school; they were the monsters, not Logan!
Quite suddenly Simon felt Logan grope his round buttocks, making him jump three feet into the air. “L-L-Logan!”
“Well I had to get your attention somehow.” Logan laughed out loud. “I was starting to think you’d gone deaf.”
“S-sorry.” Simon turned his head away slightly to hide his blushing face, though his red ears were perfectly visible to Logan.
When they finally reached Logan’s house, Simon felt a wave of nostalgia wash over him. Nothing had changed in all the years he’d stayed away. The house was neatly kept and painted an eggshell white with a dark blue door and shingles. The old tire swing was still tied by a single rope that was fastened securely on a sturdy branch of the oak tree. Quietly Simon remembered the autumn days when he and Logan would jump off the tire and into a pile of leaves. Or, when they felt up to it, meet on the roof of the patio way past their bedtimes to gave up at the stars and just talk to each other.
For the first time in seven years, everything seemed to be right again.
Logan led Simon inside of his house. When they entered the living room Simon briefly noticed that Mrs. Warden had redecorated, though it seemed a bit unmatched and not quite settled in for some reason. When Simon asked about it, Logan laughed a bit embarrassingly.
“I’m afraid that’s my fault. Two weeks when I came home from school I threw a fit and wrecked the place. My mom hasn’t been able to properly replace and arrange the furniture yet, but at least this gives her an excuse to give the living room a makeover.” He said as if it was nothing. “You wanna grab a soda?”
Simon stared at Logan, trying to figure out if he was serious or not. “No thanks, I’m good.”
“It’s your call.” Logan shrugged. “But I’m going to get myself a coke.”
After Logan grabbed his can of soda, he led Simon up the stairs towards his room. When Logan passed his door, however, Simon frowned.
“Logan, isn’t this your room?” Simon said, tapping his knuckles against the wooden door.
“I got moved down the hall.” Logan explained. “That’s Eve’s room now.”
The information unsettled him a bit, though he shouldn’t have been too surprised. He realized it was stupid to think that everything stayed exactly the same after seven long years, but it still disturbed him either way somehow.
“This is my room now.” Logan told him, taking them to the room at the far end of the hall and opened the door and walked through. When he was inside he realized that Simon was still standing out in the hallway. “What are you waiting for, permission?” Logan asked. “Come on in.”
Simon just stared at the room. The doors had locks on the outside. There were freakin’ bars on the windows as well. No matter how he looked at it, this place was more like a prison cell than a bedroom.
“Simon?” Logan’s voice snapped him out of it and the big guy looked down at him.
“Huh? Oh, sorry. I was just admiring your room.” Simon told him.
Logan gave him a look, but quickly dismissed it to Simon’s relief. “Well, what do you think?’ He asked instead.
This time Simon looked around the room, ignoring the bars and locks. It actually looked nice. A neatly arranged desk, a small bed, a TV with some game consoles in the corner and of course tons of pictures pinned onto the walls. Simon could immediately tell that these sketches and drawings were Logan’s own, though one wall consisted of some rather crude ones in marker and crayon that he assumed were Eve’s.
He couldn’t help but smile a bit. “It suits you well.” He said. “And I can see why Eve looks up to you so much.”
Logan smiled shyly back, and Simon suddenly wished he had a camera. But being in Logan’s room surrounded by all those pictures gave him an even better idea.
“Hey Logan, do you mind if…if I draw you portrait?”
The corners of Logan’s eyes crinkled, and a soft blush formed on his cheeks. “O-of course you can.” He said, tilting his head down. “I’d love it.”
Simon felt a new emotion arise inside of him. He couldn’t exactly identify it, but for some reason it made him feel like he could float in the air.
After Logan gave Simon a pad of paper and a pencil from his supplies, he sat down on the chair and assumed a natural pose. Taking a deep breath, Simon began to draw. His hands moved fast across the white surface, making his markings wherever he passed. It only took him a few minutes before it was completed to his satisfaction.
“There, what do you think?” Simon turned the pad around so Logan could see it.
To his utter disappointment, Logan frowned. “This is me?” He asked.
“Yea, it is.” Simon said uncertainly. “Is something wrong with it?”
“It…looks dead.”
Simon blinked at Logan. “Dead? Oh, do you mean you think you’re ugly? Because you’re really not-”
“It’s not that.” Logan gently cut him off. “It’s just that…well, there’s no life to it.”
“Life?” Simon looked down at the picture. It looked pretty realistic to him.
Logan ran his hand through his messy red hair. “It has no life, no…no emotion. It’s like you just drew to just get it done instead of wanting to draw it.”
“But of course I do.” Simon protested, but Logan shook his head.
“I think it’s better if I show you.” He told him as he gently tore out the page and opened the sketchbook to a fresh page. “Now, I want you to look at me.”
Simon looked right at him. “Alright.”
“No, I mean, really look at me.” Logan told him.
A bit confused, he tried to look at him more deeply. At first he saw nothing unusual. Logan’s face was plain and somewhat homely, scarred by acne. His hair was a mess and his skin was pale. He had drawn everything exactly the way he had seen it, but what was missing? He listened to Logan’s advice and tried to look at Logan deeper. At first nothing happened, but slowly he begun to see glimpses of something. Curious, he pushed himself further in. Peering deeper, he began to see more and more glimpses of something.
Suddenly it all appeared to Simon in a flash. Sitting before him was a guy who had been scarred by so many tragic events, but still kept his heart high. Simon could clearly see the suffering as well as the immense happiness in Logan’s face. And when he looked into those eyes, Simon could see Logan’s love for him reflected in those shining emeralds.
Simon looked at Logan, amazed. It was as if all this time he had been seeing Logan as an object instead of an individual person, complete with his own set of emotions and feelings.
Seeing the expression on Simon’s face, Logan nodded. “Alright. Now, I want you to hold that image firmly in your mind, then close your eyes.”
He did so, and found the image of Logan shining clearly as if it had been painted on the back of his eyelids.
“Now, I want you to start drawing. Keep your eyes closed until I tell you to open them again.” Logan’s voice said, coming out of the darkness. Softly he could feel Logan’s gentle hand touch his. “Now start.”
He moved his pencil possibly half an inch before Logan stopped him.
“Take it slow.” Logan’s voice seemed closer this time. “And don’t fight with yourself so much. Just let yourself go free and easy. Breath in and out, then start up again.”
Simon took several cleansing breaths before be started up again, this time completely relaxing himself and letting go. He felt the pencil move across the pad as if it had a mind of its own but instead of struggling with it, he instead flowed with it, neither leading nor following.
“That’s it, you’re getting it.” Logan said. Simon was suddenly aware that Logan’s voice was right next to his ear. He could feel Logan’s hand resting on his shoulder while his other hand softly held Simon’s own as they drew together in unity. When he breathed in, he could actually smell Logan’s scent. It was light and refreshing, but it also had a kind of spicy edge to it, like cinnamon. How come he never noticed it until now?
“Just go with your feelings.” Logan said gently.
He was so close; his breaths were filled with his alluring smell.
“Let yourself get washed away as you dive into the picture itself.”
Several different emotions shifted inside of him, each of them grander than the last. He didn’t know what they were exactly, but he did know he didn’t want to let them go.
“Listen to what your heart is saying, not your mind…” Logan’s voice was softer, slower. “Feel each emotion and express it through your work.”
Simon realized he was slowly turning his head towards Logan.
“Anger, sadness, despair…”
He could feel the emotion not only from him, but from Logan as well.
“Happiness, joy…”
Slowly Simon opened his eyes until he could see just barely. Logan was so close…
“Friendship…”
Logan was slowly tilting his head forward, his own eyes slowly closing. Instinctively his head moved forward of its own volition. Closer and closer until…
“Love….”
…their lips met.
In all his years of experience, nothing could have prepared Simon for that kiss. It felt like fireworks were exploding in their mouth. Logan tasted sweet, but fiery at the same time. The feeling inside their mouths soon swept their bodies, seeping into the very molecules of their being. It was so intense that Simon could feel his body heat up and his dick stir, but something else inside of him grew above all of that. It was an emotion that tied it all together into something that surpassed, no, transcended lust. It was like Simon had been incomplete until this very moment when he and Logan kissed.
Slowly, reluctantly, they broke the kiss.
The effects on Logan were incredible. His skin looked flushed and healthier than Simon had ever seen before. It was if Logan was practically glowing. Then again, Simon felt exactly the same.
The two of them sat there, both of them basking in the afterglow of that one perfect kiss.
“Wow.” Logan broke the silence first. His voice was one in utter awe.
“Yea.” Simon agreed wholeheartedly, as if that one simple word had described it all. “Wow.”
“So that’s how a kiss feels like.” Logan said, amazed. “Are all kisses that good, or is it just with you?”
“I think that was all you.” Simon told him, still recovering.”
“Really?” Those eyebrows rose. God, he looked so cute right now. “I was afraid since it was my first, I would kinda stink.”
“Actually, that was greater than any kiss I’ve ever had.” Simon admitted. “And I’ve had a lot.”
“That’s…good.” Logan looked directly into Simon’s face. “…Right?”
“Right.” Simon looked back.
Before they both knew it, they both leaned forward and kissed again.
“What the fuck!” A voice interrupted them.
Riley was standing in the doorway.
And he looked pissed.
Logan was the first to recover. “Riley, we were just-”
“Get the hell away from my brother, you sick bastard!” Riley ran forward, yanked Simon out of his chair and slammed him against the wall. “What the hell did you think you were doing!?” Riley yelled. “Do you want Logan to die sooner? Is that it? Or are you trying to give your big muscles a little boost?”
Simon looked down at Riley in surprise. “I-I-”
“Riley, let him go!” Logan grabbed Riley’s arm and tried to pull him loose, but he couldn’t budge it an inch.
“I was right about you.” Riley said with a look of disgust. “You’re nothing but a greedy bastard who doesn’t care that he’s hurting other people.”
“T-that’s not-” Simon started.
“Shut up!” Riley snapped.
“Riley, just drop him!” Logan tugged again. “I wanted to kiss him! I made the first move, not him!”
“Do you know how screwed up his life is thanks to you?’ Riley demanded. “Did you know that because of you, Logan was locked up in the goddamn room for an entire year before they let him out?”
He was right. Simon didn’t know any of that. “I….I…” He felt a sharp pain in his heart, as if someone was slowly closing his fist around it. “I’m sorry. I….”
“Riley, stop it.” Logan pleaded. “Just let him go already.”
“I used to sit outside the door and listen to him cry and scream from days on end, so don’t tell me you can win forgiveness so easily.” Riley said darkly. “Everyone may like you, but I see you for what you really are.”
“I’m sorry…” His voice died down to a whisper.
“Logan should’ve just let you fall off the roof.”
“Riley. That’s enough.” Logan’s spoke, but this time his voice was so cold that it caught them both by surprise. Logan was staring at Riley so balefully that Riley let go of Simon and actually took several steps back.
“Logan, he’s not good for-”
“Shut it.”
Riley’s mouth immediately snapped shut.
Logan took a deep breath. “I know I must be a disappointment, not being the little brother you wanted. You’re probably still mad at me for making Simon my partner and giving everything to him. But it’s not his fault. It was an accident. Brooding over it won’t change the fact that he is my Arour Dian. So deal with it.”
Riley flinched a bit, but continued to listen. This was a side of Logan he’d never seen before, and he sure as hell didn’t know how to react.
“You say you see Simon for what he really is, but you’re only seeing what you want to see.” Logan continued. “I see a wonderful person who tries his hardest. He’s always looking out for his friends, and he goes out of his way to help others. Did you know he volunteers at the senior center every month? Or that he plays basketball with the kids at the community center every other Thursday? For someone with all those big muscles, he doesn’t pick on anyone with them. Instead, he uses them to stop other bullies, like how the two of you made that anti-bullying program just a few days ago. You may think he’s selfish, but he’s actually kind and caring and generous.”
Simon stared at Logan, a bit amazed at how much Logan knew about him. He didn’t tell anyone about any of that, but Logan seemed to know all the same.
“I realize that my situation isn’t all that great.” He said. “And I know every single tap, every little brush of skin will only cut my life shorter. But you know what? I’m tired of dying slowly. I’ve been dying like that for the past seven years, and frankly it sucks. If I have to choose, I’d rather live a short life being as happy as I possibly could. And part of that plan involves being with Simon.”
It was a rather amazing sight for Simon, seeing Logan talk down at Riley Privately he wondered if he had cowered from Logan the same way.
“And you know what?” Logan said, looking over to Simon. “If I could go back to that exact moment and could redo it, I probably would have done the exact same thing again. I could never live with myself if I had just let him fall like that. And…I think I’m happier this way.
The silence that followed was so thick that they could hear each other breathing. Finally, Riley moved forward and carefully hugged Logan. “You’re too good for this, brother.” Riley whispered briefly before letting go. He didn’t say another word as he exited the room.
When Logan turned to look at Simon, Simon looked away so he wouldn’t see the tears that were beginning to form in his eyes.
“I think I’d better go.” He said.
“Alright.” Logan said understandingly. “I’ll see you later.”
“Later.” Simon agreed. Before he left, he bent down and picked up the sketchpad that had fallen to the floor and carefully ripped the page out. Carrying it carefully so as to not wrinkle it, he said his goodbyes and went home.
* * *
It was already half past one in the morning, but Simon had still yet to sleep. Instead, he sat there cross legged on his bed in the dark. In his hands was the sketch of Logan that he had drawn. Even in the dark, he could see every line and stroke that made up the image.
Logan had been right; the other picture looked dead when compared to this.
Again his thoughts shifted to him again. Slowly he replayed the last two weeks in his head. So many things had happened since that night when he found Logan behind the football stadium bleeding to death. Suddenly he was thrust into a strange world full of sadness and suffering. But even so, Logan still smiled.
The complete change of character had thrown him off guard, he surmised. He had been used to Logan being such a jerk that this new, carefree attitude had made him at a loss. Even so, this new and improved version was rather nice. All that smiling and laughter in the face of death itself, and he was willing to accept it.
Simon shifted himself into a more comfortable position and set the picture down.
What was he feeling? Before he knew he was attracted to Logan and wanted to be with him, but now he wasn’t so sure if that had been the case. Now, he was getting a lot of confused emotions, and he did his best to sort them out. He was…happy, he could gather that. At times he could hardly contain his happiness inside of him, at other times he wanted to hold Logan just for the sake of being close to him. Whenever he thought about how someone could mistreat such a good person, he felt his temper flare and his blood ring for revenge. And whenever he thought about how little time Logan had left, he felt as if someone was stabbing him in the heart.
When Logan had told Simon in the hospital that Simon didn’t really love him, he refused to believe it.
But now he did.
He hadn’t really loved Logan…until now.