Muscleboy 5: Russ' Addiction (A Soliloquy)

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Okay, I got to admit, this stuff is addicting. Good thing it's not heroin or crack or something. Yesterday, Jake tells me I don't have to take any more if I don't want. He and Brent go out, Jake to some modeling job, posing for some muscle video guys, and Brent to his office, and they tell me I can just hang, wait till they get back, we'll go work out in the pen at the beach later. And, oh by the way, he says, it's totally up to you, but Brent did up a syringe, just in case you did want to do some. It's in the fridge.

So I go shower. Of course, I stop and check out the new bod in the mirror, flex some, and instantly I'm boned. It's already got me liking the way I look, so much I quit fighting that. I mean, what guy wouldn't like to get twenty-two inch guns, a fifty inch chest, twenty-nine waist, and a dick like a fuckin' donkey. I mean, dude, nine inches, totally soft, and fat as shit, and boned, man, it's a thirteen inch cucumber. Hanging from this major beef bodybuilder body. Didn't think I wanted to get big as those pro guys, but I gotta say, it makes me feel totally hot as shit.

Anyway, so I jack and shower and put on some shorts. I gotta wear the Lycra ones Jake gave me. I can't even get into the clothes I brought here, and this is all he'll give me to wear. Those or posers. It's cool, though. I even have to admit I'm liking showing the meat I got, and the muscle. I put on a beater and head out to the walk by the beach. Getting stares, man.

I walk and walk, saying hi to people, smiling my fuckin' face off because I feel so hot because of how everyone looks at me, checks me out. But I'm noticing that the ones I'm looking back at aren't the girls, and there are some fuckin' babes out here, man. I don't think of myself as a fag, not really, but I notice, like I catch myself, I'm turning to check out the really hot looking guys that are checking me out.

And here's the thing. No matter how much I try to only think about being out there at the beach, looking like a total muscle stud packing serious meat, I keep thinking about that syringe in the fridge. And before I even realize it, I'm back home, it's in my hand, and then I just gotta have that feeling. So I jab it into my ass, and right away I'm flying, man, feeling that rush of masculine sexuality, the burning heat in me. Man, I've gotten to love that feeling.

Now after yesterday, you'd think I'd know better. My fuckin' guns exploded to twenty-three and a half, my chest is fuckin' 54 inches, and my goddamn dick bones up to fourteen fuckin' inches. My nuts are huge, like those big limes Jake gets for the margaritas. I'm totally turning into a freak, but so far, everyone seems to be getting off on it, and I keep thinking about how I feel when that shit is working on me, man, and this syringe he left for me is one quick jab to heaven, man. After yesterday, I'm already past looking like just a huge bodybuilder. I mean, you can look at my face, which has changed even more, by the way, and you can totally see I'm an eighteen year old guy, even if I have this killer shadow of heavy whiskers now, even right after I shave. But that dose yesterday gave my body a different look. Even I can see my muscles are so big and thick they don't look normal, even for a big juicehead. If I do this one, I'm going to really start to look freaky. Ha! Start! I'm already so freaky everyone comments. But they all want to see me go farther.

I know my dad will freak. Shit, the idea even makes me freak. It's so weird. I wish I didn't want it. I wish it didn't feel so hot. I know I can't go back, I'll never be a normal guy. But it's way to late to worry about that now. God, I'm shaking, just sitting here looking at this syringe in my hand. It scares the shit outta me. Why did I even take it out?

Because looking at myself in the mirror this morning made me cum without even touching my cock, just flexing and feeling my giant fuckin' pecs. Because Jake and Brent are so turned on just looking at me now, and both of them are such studs. Because I love that intense masculine sexuality, man, even if it means I'm turning gay. Just feels so hot. All I have to do is say that word to myself. Muscleboy. Oh, yeah. Muscleboy. Something so hot about it, makes me feel so hot, sexy, pure sex, masculine sex, muscle sex. Gives me the guts.

There. Tiny sting, feel that medicine burn as it goes in, then toss the needle and wait.

I could put something on and go out by the beach and wait. So cool, feeling it start to work when I'm out in front of people. And those new posers, so thin and stretchy to hold all this meat, and so, so skimpy. Go down, walk along the surf, get the poser wet so it clings, get the hair all wet. Not like most of the guys out there don't know what's going on with me, now, anyway.

Or I can stay in, concentrate on it.

Oh, man. Oh yeah, here it comes. God, I love the way it feels when it starts to come on. So stony in such a clear-headed way. All-time best party drug. Ten times as horny as crystal meth, as sensual and up as ecstasy, and the rush, the energy. Oh yeah. Mmmm. It's like nothing ever felt so good before, nothing, ever, in my life.

Just sit here and let it happen, feel it happen. God, it's like flying and diving under the waves at the same time. Oh, man. Look at me. Holy God, I'm so fucking beautiful. Shit, I fucking fall in love with myself, my body, more, every time. Look at that cock man, already so fat and long. I couldn't even imagine it could feel so hot just to have a huge cock and big fuckin' balls, but God, does it ever. Look at that fucker. Look at it, like a fuckin' cobra, rising up, getting fatter, longer, lifting. Oh, shit, I love how that feels when it lays against my thigh, creeps up, flops over, keeps creeping up toward my hip till, yeah, there it goes, it lifts off, stands up, points up to my abs and chest. Shit, you couldn't stop a hard-on from this shit no matter what. Fuckin' cock gets a mind of its own, and it's right here in these big fuckin' hairy balls. Jeez, they're so fuckin' big. Churning out those hormones. Oh, man. Like flooding me with 'em. Oh, God. Makes me feel so intense, man, so intense. I fuckin' love this, man, dude, guy, stud. Fuck, so masculine, even my fuckin' skin is masculine. Muscleboy. Yeah. Want me to be their big fukin' muscleboy. Awww, shit, there it goes, man. High gear. Revved. Oh, shit. That feeling, man, mmmm. Inside my skin, shit, the muscle contracting so hard it forces itself to swell. Oh God, oh, God. Oh, man, my fuckin' pecs are on fire, man, pulling so hard, lats pulling back and down, against each other, fuck, like they're gonna tear apart. But they won't. No, aww shit. They just swell up from the effort, get thicker, bigger. Oh, God, man, my pecs, man. They're so fuckin' huge and already getting thicker. Wider. Holy shit. They feel so heavy. God, I fuckin' love how that feels, the weight of muscle getting bigger, thicker. Awww, man, and my guns. God, so fuckin' thick, so flexed, bis against tris, pulling so hard against each other, swelling up again, like some fuckin' movie monster, man. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. Yeah. Make me a fuckin' monster, dudes. Fuck, my cock, man, it's like totally alive, so hard it feels like the skin could split. Fuck, watching your goddamn cock grow, man. Fuck. Look at that. It's so thick and so fuckin' long, and I can see it getting bigger now with every thump pushin' blood into it. Oh God, oh God, it's so intense. More than yesterday. Fuckers gave me a bigger dose. Fuck, that horse cock is gonna hit sixteen at least. Should go check it out in the mirror. Doubt if I could even walk, my legs are so flexed man, I can barely move them. Fuckin' quads and calves quivering they're so flexed. Fuck, man, look at those striations, those veins popping. Oh, man, Oh fuckin' shit, man. Look at my fuckin guns. They're getting so huge. And my pecs. Holy shit, man, the way they're swelling, mounding. I can't even see my nips, man. They're totally rolled under the mass. And more of that hair, too, tiny little hairs all over 'em, trailing down my abs. God, feel those abs, man, like fuckin' bricks. Precum all over 'em. Horse cock is fuckin' dripping. Aww, fuck, man, this is so intense, I feel so fuckin hot, man. Fuckin' muscleboy, man, makin' me a fuckin' muscleboy monster. Yeah. Play with this muscleboy, man. Anything you fuckin' want. It's all for you, dudes. Awww, yeah.