That and Only That (A Love Story)

Synopsis: A young man succumbs to the wiles of a clever hypnotist, enjoying all that he ever desired and getting much more than he bargained for.

I sit in a hotel room, alone. I think of the recent experiences. And the memories sweep over my consciousness like a wave of reality. Unwanted and yet lived for.

What began as just another business trip now, in retrospect, takes on a deeper meaning; a shift of identity, an attitude that will neither be denied nor rectified. To think that a simple meeting of the minds could lead to a life-altering experience would not be expected. In fact, simple meetings that alter the course of life are rare. But they do happen, and many times, they lead to a new path. Of course, those are the lucky few that choose the right path (or have it chosen for them). While choosing the right path may lead to freedom and cherished bliss, a wrong choice can lead to confusion and pain. Destiny is ours to choose. Or is it?

First, let me introduce myself. My name is Dr. B.L. Shands. Well, not really a doctor. But people know me as such. I am a hypnotist. Not the clinical or therapeutic variety, but one that loves to explore the fetish of erotic hypnosis with subjects. And I have been doing so for a long time. I may not be an actual doctor, but I have earned an honorary degree, many times over.

Before I left on the fateful business journey, I placed an advertisement in the local paper of a town that I was scheduled to visit. “Seeking good young men who desire to explore themselves through hypnosis,” the ad read. “Experience full relaxation and complete release, and feel the depth of your wants and desires float to the surface. In hypnosis, you experience exactly what your inner mind begs for. Succumb to the pleasures of exploration, and you will never be the same.” The ad went on to assure the reader and potential candidates that this adventure into hypnosis would be like none other, allowing erotic exploration and full release of inhibitions, in a safe environment. “Give in to the adventure.”

Which town was this? Which local paper did I place my ad in? Where did this monumental event happen? you might ask. Well, over the course of a lifetime, it has happened in many a town. You see, when a hypnotist like me continues his quest for the perfect hypnotic subject, finding one will just never do. So, the experience is repeated from town to town, finding wonderful “new loves” and Hypnotic Nirvana in many a place. But though the names always change, the scenarios that play out all seem vaguely familiar.

To explain a bit of the phenomena surrounding this quest for hypnotic exploration, allow me to enlighten you on a few of the “unspoken ground rules” that typically exist.

There are several traits that a hypnotist looks for in a prime hypnotic subject, especially one that will be filling both a need for erotic pleasure and for emotional intimacy. I suppose that the pleasure and gratification go both ways in such an exchange, but at least from the hypnotist’s perspective, there are always physical and emotional needs to be met.

Trait Number One: Willingness.

Subjects will be so curious, willing, and open to experiencing the new things that hypnosis causes, nothing short of an eager giddiness to experience hypnosis, to feel the power, etc. will suffice. The more willing the person is, the greater is the level of possibilities to be explored.

Trait Number Two: Openness

An innate ability to open one’s mind and body, releasing any possible defense mechanisms and freeing one’s mind. For whatever reason, when someone is open to new ideas and new experiences, a hypnotist sees the vast potential that exists. A subject once said to me, “I’m a blank canvas. A slate to be written on. I want to explore the things that excite me most, and I know that hypnosis will let me do that. I don’t have any experience with being hypnotized, but I just know it will be wonderful. I am so excited!” And so he proved to be.

Openness. Trust. Willing intimacy. Naiveté. All are implied in these statements. And whether the potential subjects see or truly understand the possibilities and the potential, the hypnotist recognizes the potential immediately. For hypnotists like me, the knowledge of a willing subject “dangling on my hook” is the strongest aphrodisiac imaginable. “Play it cool. Don’t blow it. Don’t seem eager,” the hypnotist might say to himself. But deep inside, the hypnotist wants nothing so much as the chance to fully captivate his subject. Physically, mentally, emotionally. Submission leads to control, leads to intimacy, leads to love, leads to ownership. “I will care for you,” the hypnotist says. But what is implied by the hypnotist’s comment is, “I will give you every feeling and every experience you can imagine while you are hypnotized. And, in return, you will give me your respect, your obedience, your willingness, your most intimate secrets and deep inside, every emotion that is available to be given. When you submit to me, you will give yourself to me completely. You will love me. And I will love you in return.”

Exerting hypnotic control over someone is not unlike performing mental brainwashing and emotional kidnapping. Taking what is not yours and making it yours. A hypnotist like me thrives on the rush that comes with controlling someone’s mind and body, feeling that transfer of power so completely, and knowing that another person’s full mental and physical capabilities are being released to him, to do with as he wills it. The hypnotist, in a position of full control, can then freely take that person to places undreamt of. All because of the subject’s implied gift. “I give myself to you. Willingly.”

OK. So now you know my dirty little secret. I get off on controlling guys, a “hypnotic predator.” Feeling them willingly melt into my creamy voice, my pseudo-angelic words, my soothing touch. And the more it seems that my words and my touch bring a guy closer to full relaxation and release, the more excited I become. When it happens, I feel their willingness to submit to me, and it feeds me with excitement and adrenaline. The problem with this, however, is that most guys that submit to hypnosis are completely unaware of just what a gift they are providing to me. They only realize they are having, or have had, a diversion, an exciting evening, perhaps experiencing a mental lapse of memory and thinking to themselves, “that’s cool!” But what they experience as a “cool diversion” is also feeding my needs to control them, to keep them, to have them just where I choose to have them, and to make them give of themselves to me, without their knowledge or awareness, or even their conscious consent. We have all heard of the “evil hypnotist,” and for good reason!

So, this brings me to the latest in the series of hypnotic events, the latest love affair of the mind. Let’s call him “Trevor.”

When Trevor answered my ad, excited about the possibilities of exploring the unknown with me, I could tell that he was an open book, just waiting to be read and marked up as only I can do. In his late 20’s, recently out of the closet and still suffering from a breakup, he wanted a new experience. He wanted release mentally from the shackles of his home life, family, etc. You know, to escape reality for a while. And that is precisely what I was offering. I could feel his need to escape. I could feel his overwhelming vulnerability. And in talking with him, I could just feel how good it was going to be. The power lurking within my passion had to be masked and bridled. But it was there. Oh yes. And that promise of intoxicating power was stronger than ever.

I suggested to Trevor that, “as a service to him,” I would even be willing to document his hypnotic journey for him. With my camera, he could see himself in hypnosis, experiencing this perhaps without any other recollections than what might exist on film. He had no idea how much this gesture also eased my way into my love of mental and physical voyeurism. He could experience seeing the results of his deep hypnotic adventure, but I would forever hold his images captive in my mind, in the memory of his touch, his feel, his smell. I would feel in my mind his body next to mine, his lips mingling with my own. I would have living and definite proof that his adorable smile and his Adonis-like features had been all mine, willingly and shamelessly.

Let’s get into some of those details that we all know and love, and love to share…

When we met, Trevor was a young and beautiful man, closely shaven on some parts of his body yet swarthy and rugged at the same time. A Latino with full grown attributes, yet a face as young and angelic as any ever seen on the frescoes of the Sistine Chapel. Trevor was very well muscled, every sinewy fiber taut and pulled with the innocent strength of boyhood. Dark and tan, with just a hint of stubble on his face and closely shaven head, he was the epitome of Mr. Clean, having that strong genie-in-the-bottle look about him. Ah, that mixture of bone-crushing strength and youthful excitement does turn me on so! I close my eyes and the memory takes me back… Just look at him! So willingly complying with my commands for surrender. So fully excited to give of himself to me! And such a statuesque form to have within my grasp! I felt my heart racing. My need to remain calm and composed increased with each step closer to the eager boy. Trevor’s athleticism showed in every move, and his body was the stuff dreams were made of! Ah, but I am getting ahead of myself.

When Trevor arrived at my hotel room, I could sense his nervousness and a touch of shyness. How adorable it was. And how exciting! Knowing that nervousness is the perfect chaser to a hypnotic cocktail that only I know how to whip up, I knew then that it was going to be a hypnotic session not to be forgotten. At least not forgotten by me. He stepped into my room, and immediately locked eyes with mine. I reached out and gently placed my hands on his broad shoulders. I could feel him physically melt into my touch, so great his need for release. And his eyes surveyed mine, showing me how much of a mental sponge he was within this setting. I was more excited than ever! After a few pleasantries, I led him to a comfortable chair strategically placed for him. He performed a few preliminary tests, showing his keen abilities to listen and to follow instructions implicitly. His ability to mold to hypnotic persuasion was uncanny and immediate. It took only a few initial tests before I immediately snapped him into deep hypnosis. No sooner had the crystal stopped spinning than he was a crumpled mass of muscle, slumped in the chair, his arms heavy and sunken to the floor. His head nodded and swayed in accordance with each touch and each suggestion, making this experience even more intoxicating for me. Every command, every suggestion, every post-hypnotic suggestion followed and acted upon completely and without question.

In Trevor’s vulnerable and submissive state, all channels of his mind were opened to me, both the subconscious and unconscious minds tuned to my voice directly, soaking in each command as gospel and assimilating each implanted suggestion. And I used this vulnerability to the fullest extent, adjusting his emotional needs to match my own, instilling the commands that would bring amazingly powerful sexual gratification to him as he served me completely. And he reacted to my commands so wonderfully. As he willingly and unconsciously dropped each piece of clothing to the floor, they disappeared from sight and from recollection, leaving this bronze Adonis naked and available for each whim I chose to impart. I was truly giddy with all that could be done with him! Trevor unconsciously pressed his body close to mine, melting into my arms, his amazingly sexy body nothing more than a plaything for the Master. The size and girth of his cock was undeniably enticing, a full 12 inches from base to tip, wide and veined for pleasure. And each slight touch to his dick or to his nipples brought a moan of ecstasy from his lips. (It is wonderfully diabolical how a hypnotist like me is able to manipulate even the simplest and most basic of sexual appetites into a tool for domination.) With each touch and each strategically placed command, Trevor was taken deeper into trance and the inner knowledge that obedience equals passion and pleasure. Of course, this was not without much benefit to Trevor, as well. Some commands brought him close to and finally to completion of orgasm, his mind engaged, again and again erupting in voluminous and submissive release. Some commands froze his body just as posed, to facilitate the absolute photographic capture of each excited detail of his body. (Being able to capture him with eyes open, staring blankly, a white canvas absorbing each of my intricately laid suggestions, was a distinct pleasure for me. Now, captured and immortalized on film, these images do not tarnish or fade from memory.) Some commands I gave to Trevor brought him to a memory of wonderful times, tripping on Ecstasy, and others elicited that complete and utter love and devotion normally reserved for only the most intimate of partners. (And yes, a hypnotist like me knows just how to take that submission and use it fully.) I brought Trevor to a place in his mind where the need to feel this love and this devotion, in the form of my voice and my touch, coupled with the deep gaze into my face, was stronger than ever. With a word, Trevor locked his lips to mine, unbridled passion. Uninhibited exuberance and drive for complete bodily submission. He heard my words without remembering, and yet his body and mind complied with the implanted need to obey, to give freely, and to feel the love and passion so rare and yet so crucial to his sexual survival. To Trevor, his gift to me was his gift to himself… he felt all things intensely and sensually. And as he succumbed to each implanted command, fully and without question, my needs and desires were fulfilled. I was filled with Trevor’s innocence, with his emotion, with his body, with his cock and balls at my disposal and at my command. I explored his body from head to toe, frozen or writhing in pleasure from my touch and my command. We continued to examine and explore his fantasies and his fetishes together. (Having been a straight man for most of his life, his need for an outlet to feel the domination of another had never been fully explored before. And the strength and power in this new feeling was, to Trevor, immeasurable! Even now, there are commands planted deep within his subconscious minds, seeds of imminent control, commands that Trevor has no collection of, but that bring wonderful sensations to his body and mind whenever I choose to provide them. When he wants to feel submission, even to be spanked and owned and controlled, there are commands lurking that will bring this experience to the surface and send chills of anticipation, excitement, electricity, and outstanding fulfillment to him. See? I am not all bad… A subject such as Trevor gets exactly what his wishes and dreams are from me. He just gets to experience all his desires come to reality, but under my terms. Naughty, aren’t I?) Knowing how completely his mind reacted to me, his ability to react to commands of full amnesia appealed especially to me. Being able to wipe his mind of all knowledge of activities, implanted suggestions, and overall control of his every thought and feeling, I felt a surge of power and ownership of this fine specimen of manhood, however brief the ownership might have lasted. I felt his body touch mine, react to every command or sensation and feeling. And while I effectively wiped the knowledge of every post-hypnotic command from his conscious recollection, I knew that I would retain an element of control that connected directly to his willing subconscious mind, just waiting to be activated again at my bidding and at the appropriate times. The commands I planted within his mind will instantly take him back to a place that brings him ecstasy while still giving me the surge of hypnotic domination that I crave to exert!

All right now. Should I really be taking so much pleasure away from this experience, from this knowledge that I will always own a part of him? I can only judge that, from how his body and mind reacted to my words and to my touch, he was deriving incomparable pleasure from the experience. Exploring his kinky fetishes in an environment that let his mind run loose and assured his body was free to explore the unmentionable with wild abandon, Trevor was getting all he asked for, and more than he bargained for. In fact, I took pleasure in knowing that I brought the absolute heights of stimulation to him with such unfiltered force, every sense that his mind and body could be aware of was being shattered, overwhelmed with the reality of passion and submission. Bombarded like a tidal wave blasting his body and mind, Trevor was experiencing the true nature of his desires, multiplied to the intensity that only hypnosis is capable of providing.

Yes, I am a taker. But I am also a giver. Yes, I give everything. And I take everything in return.

Trevor had been shivering and vibrating with excitement for hours, his mind and body having felt every pleasure, both guilty and otherwise. I applied oil to his well-muscled physique and took those last few pictures that completed my collection, those photos of his body writhing as it came once more, as it spewed juices and love beads in all directions. That capture of his face as he felt a tongue placed deep within his virgin ass, just at the point of also being sucked and cumming uncontrollably. I did love playing with Trevor, as every word brought complete experiences to his mind, painting my pictures of choice onto his blank canvas of life. And that was a pleasure for us both. With one final word, Trevor’s cum-soaked and sweat-laden body collapsed back to the bed, both immeasurably happy and luxuriously spent from the experience, a smile spread broadly across his face.

Time moves forward.

The session had now ended. Trevor was reminded of the hours that had passed, hours that seemed only like minutes. Trevor had seen the photos that proved his willing participation in the very fetishes and deepest desires that he specifically requested prior to our meeting. He had seen the proof that he had definitely “lived within the moment,” experiencing life at such a high intensity that no knowledge of reality thus far could have compared. He was overwhelmed by the experience, and knew he must return for more. He knew the power in this submission. And he only knew that he must obey his need to return, to be filled by this overpowering experience again and again. Trevor left my hotel room, slightly dazed and grinning from ear to ear. I basked in the glory of my conquest, thrilled at the experience and immediately planning for another meeting with the boy of my dreams.

Time moves forward again. Day 3. Should I have been surprised that I had not heard from Trevor? That my calls and messages to him had gone unanswered? It was not the first time that I experienced life with someone full-force, and they chose to go in a different direction. Yes, it had been a wild experience. Yes, it had blown his mind. Hell, it had blown my mind! But how could I have instilled the need for him to return for more? How could what seemed to be an everlasting impression on his young and tender mind now be only a distant memory, with no chance of repeating the pleasure? It troubled me. It troubles me still. Had I wronged him in some way? Sure, I took what I wanted from him. But I gave it back in multiples. How could he not have seen that? How is it that he couldn’t see that what I did, I had done for him? Of course, if that were fully true, then I would not be as upset now by his lack of response and follow-through. When will he learn that I know best what he needs? (When will I learn what it is that I truly need?)

And it is only now that I realize that the pattern so entrenched in my hypnotic life has continued. I have fallen in love with yet another hypnotic conquest, not seeing that the naïve exuberance and willing and playful actions of a hypnotized and controlled stud are not necessarily the willing responses of an alert man, complete with a life that leads in any direction but to that of a traveling hypnotist. As much as I would like to take a fantastic moment and spread it into a lifetime of fantasy, it is not to be. While I am sure that I made a mark and a lasting impression on Trevor’s mind, it is not meant to be more than just a temporary diversion, a moment of shared excitement. A wisp of fantasy dissipated into the ether. That and only that.

Oh, I’ve seen the likes of Trevor before. A young man so captivated by the experience, so willing to give up all control and give into the previously unmentioned desires deep inside, the reality of the experience blasts full-force into his psyche. And the knowledge that a single word or phrase from the “powerful hypnotist” would immediately bring about that full surrender, once again, seems impossible. But he knows it is true. And yes, his feelings are founded in reality. Given the chance, a hypnotist like me would surely take the boy back to that place of ecstasy. Trevor’s knowledge of this, that a word could cause this, prevents him from responding to me further. Even he knows that my words easily bring him to a place that he both desires and fears the most. (His reaction, his avoidance of my calls and messages, should not be a surprise. They are simply a defense mechanism for him. And yet, it does surprise me once again. Funny. Ironic. An idealistic hypnotist.) You would think that at this point in my life and within the hypnotic conquest game, tears would not come to my eyes. But they do. It hurts as much now as it always does.

(Side Note: Trevor, if you are reading this, I am sorry. Well, sorry that I don’t get more of you. And sorry that there are not many more like you that cross my path. For what it is worth, I enjoyed my time with you.)

The loneliness now returns. I look around my empty hotel room. I have the knowledge that I will soon return to my empty home. And I will return to a life filled with void. Voided relationships. I know the void. I welcome the void. At least I am quite familiar with it. At least until my next conquest. I have so much love to give. And to take.

“Now seeking good young men who desire to explore themselves through hypnosis. Is that man you? Feel free to contact me for details. I know just what you need.”

And the game begins, once again.